Previously on Hang Up…

Timo: I've been very liberal in my search for pleasure in the great outdoors 

Timo received a mystery box from their Callers.

Timo: I feel so funny talking about people's boxes. 

They had a clear connection with each of them.

Muriah: I feel like I could talk to you for hours. 

Salix: It was the best of times, it was the worst of times

Billy: I'm here for all the, like, tingles.

Cedar: When you want something, you get it. So I'm going to get it. 

But in the end, it was easy for Timo to choose who to hang up on… because Ness ghosted them.

Timo: Actually, she stood me up.

Welcome to Hang Up, a reality dating show with no rings attached.

I’m your host, Zakiya Gibbons.

Here’s how the show works.

Every week, our Star Timo goes on a themed date with each of their Callers. All of these dates happen exclusively over the phone.

Cedar: So welcome to this madness.

The Star and their Callers never see each other and at first, can’t describe how they look.

And they all change their names so they can’t find each other outside of the show.

The Callers have only one date per week to make themselves heard.

And if they can’t establish a clear connection, they risk getting the hang up. Eliminating them from the show.

The Star hangs up on one Caller each week.

This week… four Callers remain: Cedar, Salix, Muriah, and Billy.

To stay on the line, they must win over Timo. And in the end, the winning caller has a choice to make: an all expenses paid vacation with Timo sponsored by Both& Apparel. Or hang up on them, and take a cash prize of one thousand dollars.

The theme of this week’s date is: Phone a Friend.

Timo is dialing in someone else to take their place. That person will go on their own date with each Caller, then, recommend who Timo should hang up on next.

Roxanne: That is fucking rad.

Who will stay on the line? And whose connection will be dropped?

Timo: The sensuality was there and it was drawn out of me. I was helpless.

Find out this week on Hang Up.

Zakiya Hi, Timo. 

Timo Hi Zakiya. 

Zakiya Okay. I'm, like, rolling up my metaphorical sleeve here. This week you had a bunch of packages dropped off at your house full of goodies picked out just for you. 

Timo: Mm hmm. 

Zakiya: So let's hear who was dialed in and who phoned it in. 

Timo All right. 

Zakiya I actually already got some of this tea. We already heard that Billy had your favorite box. 

clip:

Billy Please talk about my box. I wanna talk about my box.

Timo Billy. Billy had a good box.Yes. I'm never going to get tired of that. 

Zakiya Me neither. 

Timo Just the way that they assembled everything that was in the box was really deliberate and careful. And, you know, when I heard the prompt for this date about being, you know, about sensory engagement, I feel like that, you know, Billy just did the best job of that, in my opinion. There were leaves like dried leaves and a seed pod. They also put in a little Ziploc bag, a swatch of their flannel shirt, like one of their work shirts. 

Zakiya Woah, that is sexy. 

Timo And folded up and put in like a little Ziploc so that the smell was retained and it…

Zakiya Oh my God.

Timo And it smelled like wood smoke and like, you know, just like a warm body. It just it aligned with how I might assemble a package like that for that prompt for somebody. And so that felt very like in tune.

Zakiya How would you describe Billy's vibe as you gleaned from this box? 

Timo Oh, yeah, I would say, green and like, verdant, you know, and connected and intimate. I felt like I was in the forest, right? It was almost like, Oh, I was imagining Billy in the forest while we were having our conversation, which was lovely. 

Zakiya Could you imagine yourself hiking in the forest with Billy? 

Timo Oh, absolutely. 

Zakiya As friends or? 

Timo As friends, as lovers, I mean yeah, absolutely, I'm getting a vibe. I'm getting a real vibe from them. 

Zakiya I heard your date with Billy also got a little sexy. Were y'all talking about fucking outdoors? 

Timo I mean, look, OK, look.

Zakiya How are you going to skip over that? You know I'm going to ask about that.

Timo I didn’t know you were gonna get that part, oh my god. Okay, I'm blushing. 

Zakiya I can feel you blushing through the mic. 

Timo Look. Okay. Sometimes. Sometimes I forget that we are not alone on our dates. 

Zakiya Okay, So that means you are really in the moment. 

Timo I was in the moment. She hit all the right notes, right? You know, like, the sensuality was there and it was drawn out of me. I was. helpless. I don't know. I don't know. It felt natural and spontaneous and very charming. Very, very cute. Very sexy. 

Zakiya Y'all are making me want to take a hike. I should go hiking more. So just to be clear, Billy had your favorite box, but your date with Billy was also the best, you would say?

Timo I would say I mean, I would say that the— pretty tied with Salix in terms of like the date itself you know and the conversation, the kind of like connection was also really, really good with Salix. 

CLIP:

Salix: you know, it's so funny, cause I feel like I have a very similar experience in the fact that like I also am in transition.

Zakiya Yeah. Tell me about your date with Salix. What was in their box?

Timo Salix sent me this lovely gift bag. And there was some wine in there, There was some cheese in there, there was a nice little, you know, little scattering of things. But most importantly, there was a brown paper sandwich bag labeled in black marker on the front, it said “bag of mystery.” And and inside they had written out these different questions like prompts for conversation. And their impulse to play and the way that they talk about play and their relationship to creativity in play is really, really hitting the mark for me. It challenged me sort of like, “Oh. You know, they're the youngest one” Or whatever, you know, it's just always goes to say, like, you know, just be just be humble and open. And. And be willing to be surprised, you know? 

Zakiya Yeah, I love that malleability. You have that willingness to be surprised. I feel like that's really important with dating. If you know, if you're really wanting to make a genuine connection. Now, so Salix is like, sounds like one of your faves. 

Timo Salix is a contender. 

Zakiya Oh. Okay. So now we have Muriah and Cedar. Who do you want to chat about? 

Timo Let's talk about Cedar first.

CLIP

Cedar: If we connect, you'll be Ursula. I'll paint you. I'll be Jafar.

Cedar’s box was meticulously packed, and they put in a lot of things that they, you know, they enjoy and thought that I would enjoy, and they're super into, like Halloween. So they put in, they put so much stuff. And there is like a pumpkin that was like foam that you can get from the craft store and then all these art supplies that you can like actually carve into this foam pumpkin. 

Zakiya How big was this box? A pumpkin?

Timo It was really big. It was like a medium sized pumpkin. Muriah's bag was also very big. But yeah, so Cedar put a lot of care and a lot of thought into into that box. And I feel like I did get to know them and I don't know, we had some, we had some good exchanges. I just felt that… I don't know how to say this. I don't want to be like. Cedar is in the in the midst of in the thick of it all the time. I don't know how else to say that. Cedar is the moment. And I guess I felt sometimes that like I wasn't sure if they were hearing me when I responded or if I would try to ask them something or like share something, I didn't always feel like I had the opportunity to. But, I mean, some of that might just be being over the phone and not being able to sort of like pick up on each other's cues and body language. So. I don’t know, it just left me feeling like a little bit… I don't know how well I was heard or felt in that moment, you know? 

Zakiya Yeah. She has a big ass personality, you know, she takes up a lot of space in a way that I'm like, “yes.” Be loud, be be expansive. She really is the moment. 

Timo Right. And I love that. I love that. But at the same time, I don't know if I love it as a partner or if I love it more as an audience member. Do you know what I mean? He's entertaining, he's vibrant. He has so much to offer. And I just think that they've got like, Oh, yeah, just like star power energy, right? But I know myself, and I know that I also need those quiet moments and I need to feel centered and help to feel grounded. And I just feel that with Cedar, I might be the constant grounding force. I want to be around that energy, but I don't know if I want to be with that energy. Do you know what I mean? 

Zakiya No, I do know what you mean. And you said I think you said that you don't necessarily feel heard. Can you say more on that? 

Timo Yeah. There would just be moments where I was like, okay, you know, like you're kind of going back and forth and, like, sharing information or asking, a follow up question, you know, and I'd sort of like wait for a moment where I felt like, okay, I can kind of like come in with that follow up question or I'd start to answer something that they had asked me and they would be off and running again. They're brilliant and funny and those thoughts are great, but it's also like hard kind of fitting myself in edgewise around it. 

Zakiya Mm

Timo And here's another thing. Just on a lighter note. Cedar is also, like, super into Halloween and into Disney in particular, which is like all cute and stuff, but like, not a lot of overlap on my interests. And I think that was another thing that was just kind of like, I'm not sure. It just was like a little off putting. Where it's like, this is cute and I know all these like Disney songs and everything cause I have kids, and I was a kid and you know, they're fun and funny, but I'm like, I'm not going to Disney World unless I'm taking my kids. It's not for me. It's not like a red flag. It's kind of like, yeah, it's like. It's like a yellow flag for me. 

Zakiya Yeah, yeah, yellow flag, yeah, yeah. Because it's like, not necessarily a bad thing, but it is a flag that alerts you that, oh, we have different interests and therefore might not be compatible. 

Timo Yeah. 

Zakiya You know, one thing I'm thinking of is that you're switched on with Salix because of the playfulness. 

Timo Yes. 

Zakiya Cedar is also, like, so playful, like this box sounds, playful, just, you know, her personality is playful. You're wanting to tap more into your expansiveness. Cedar has all of that. So what do you what do you think of that? Do you think that... 

Timo Dammit Zakiya. You know, I'm a Libra. This is already hard for me, this decision making. I think that's true. But I think what is the hallmark of a good game is the volley, right? And that feeling of rhythm between the two people. So I feel like, yes, Cedar is ready to play and is very adventurous and fun and like funny, just very funny. I just don't know that we're volleying at the same rate, you know, or the same kind of rhythm, I should say. 

Zakiya I hear you. Okay, So let's let's move on to Muriah. 

CLIP

Muriah: I feel like I could talk to you for hours.

How did you like Muriah’s box? 

Timo Muriah also— Muriah lavished me with this like, really, it was like, the biggest one, it was this really tall gift bag, and it was just packed, packed, packed with, like, amazing stuff. Muriah also loves horror, and so there was a couple of movies in there, sort of like Cedar, where it was like the candy, the popcorn, like the concession kind of style snacks and some, you know, self-care things as well, and I felt like it was yeah, I was just like very sweet, but I just like it, honestly, their boxes were so similar, their packages, so like Cedar and Muriah had very similar packages was, is funny because they're also like kind of similar personality, especially in the group calls

Zakiya I was thinking the same thing. 

Timo Yeah, yeah. But Muriah, our conversation pace was, was good. It just, I don't know, like, I just felt like there weren't as many things to connect on. I don't know. Not a lot of spark for me on my side, you know? And I'd go back to my notes and like, Oh yeah, we talked about that, you know. 

Zakiya What did you all talk about? 

Timo Yeah, I mean, we talked about like, I believe Muriah has a daughter, And so we talked about that. We definitely have like the parenting thing in common, which was, you know, something that I was really hoping for also going in was maybe to find somebody who also has parenting experience in the sense of like, you know, the growth and and changes and, you know, perspectives that come along with that. But I just kind of didn't feel like there was, I don't know, like it is like if you meet somebody and you're like, Oh, I met this really nice person and we had a nice conversation, but like, maybe I'll run into them on the bus again someday, you know what I mean? Like it feel like that. That sounds so dismissive, but it just didn't feel like connected. 

Zakiya No, I don't think that sounds dismissive. I feel like that sounds very real. Muriah also has a big personality in group settings. Did she have, did she keep that same energy with you? 

Timo No and maybe that was part of it was just like, you know, she's you know, like in that hot line with Cedar, you know, that little back and forth and stuff they had going was like, y'all have more spark than I have with you two. 

Zakiya Interesting. 

Timo Almost like Cedar and Muriah, y'all should maybe have a moment. 

Zakiya Yeah spinoff, Cedar and Muriah get together. 

Timo I would go definitely, like, pick up game of basketball with Muriah, sign me up, you know? 

Zakiya Yeah, Yeah. 

Timo Like, I get that feeling for sure. But do I feel romantic? Not so far. Not so far.

Zakiya You know, it's interesting because you said this one more thing about Salix. You're, like, romantic. I don't know

Timo I did.

Zakiya So I'm curious, like, do you think, like, is the door fully shut on Muriah or do you think there’s potentially like, oh, who knows, maybe next date or like, you know, maybe down the line there is room for that romantic connection?

Timo Oh, absolutely. I'm not writing any anybody off, Not Muriah not Cedar. Like, absolutely not. 

Zakiya Okay, so I do want to talk about Ness. 

Voice: The number cannot be reached now. Please hang up and try again later.

What was your first reaction when you heard that she ghosted? 

Timo Well, I mean, the first thing I thought wasn't even about ghosting. It was like, Oh my gosh, what happened to Ness? Like, I'm, you know, it's I hate having that question mark over, you know, whether or not she's okay. Like, we just don't know. And then my second thought was, what did I say? Like, what did I do? Did I hurt her feelings? Did I say something wrong in that Speed Dial date? Like crap, like I must have, you know, scared, scared her off or something. I don't know. Oh. 

Zakiya No, that is so relatable. Yeah. No, first of all, we hope Ness is okay. And that's why the hardest thing about ghosting is just not knowing. Especially about that person's well-being. 

Timo Yeah, exactly. 

Zakiya But also the other side like that, you said, is that, you know, I feel like not knowing or feeling in the dark about something is just a breeding ground for insecurities. 

Timo Yeah.

Zakiya I know Ness was at the top of your list last time.

Timo Yes.

Zakiya So how do you feel about her not being in the running anymore? 

Timo I feel disappointed. I really do. And I and I, I was excited to continue talking with her and, like, finding out more about her. She made a great first impression on me. It's just, yeah, it's disappointing. Yeah, I'm a little bit bummed. 

Zakiya Yeah. That makes a lot of sense. Let's talk about the next date. We're going to shift gears. 

Timo Okay.

Zakiya Now we're at the point where your dates are going to the next level. The four remaining callers will have their calls transferred to your friend or family member for the Phone A Friend date. So have you chosen who you're dialing in? 

Timo Yes, I have chosen a dear friend of mine and…Oh, gosh, okay. Yes. Her pseudonym. I had to think of it for a second, I couldn’t remember, I had to remind myself. Her pseudonym is Roxanne. Roxanne! 

Zakiya Yes. Sexy name. 

Timo Roxanne is very sweet and dear. And very. Oh. I don't know how to describe Roxanne. Roxanne is brash, brazen, in your face. Roxanne is a Capricorn. I love Capricorns, especially Capricorn Women. Oh, my God. Give me a Capricorn woman bestie. And I'm happy. 

Zakiya Yes. 

Timo She's a sociologist. She is a… This is Dr. Roxanne. Okay. Let me tell you, Roxanne is not to be played with. 

Zakiya She's going to have her pad of paper out asking all the questions and making all the observations. 

Timo The data, The data. The gathering of data. 

Zakiya Yes. Roxanne sounds amazing. So how do you know her? How did you all meet? 

Timo Oh, my gosh. I don't know if I want to tell this story on the air. 

Zakiya Well, damn. Okay, now I really want to know. 

Timo Oh my god. So, look, the thing is that the shes the theys, the queers, the women, we have to stick together in this world, right? It is rough right there. Okay. Roxanne and I met because she was talking with somebody that I ended up being in a pretty serious but very brief and like, hellacious relationship with who had some very narcissistic traits. And so basically, I ended up doing sort of forensics. On this person. As things went bad and it connected and ended up leading me to all these women and all these other incidents. And so Roxanne was enmeshed with me in this web of of deceit and nonsense with this person that I had been seeing. And so I reached out and Roxanne was like, hell, yeah, let's talk. Let's meet. And that had turned into a platonic romance that is undeniable. 

Zakiya Wow. Wait, let me get it straight. So you were dating someone and they were shitty. And you were like, they’re so shitty that I need to investigate this person and, like, who they are, what their background is. 

Timo And it was dark. It was bad. It was criminal. It was bad. 

Zakiya Like, literally. 

Timo Literally criminal. Yeah. 

Zakiya Yeah. Okay. It was Roxanne also dating this person?

Timo Very casually, Roxanne had gone out on a few, like, dates with this person, and so it was not super well connected with them, but was also connected with them through other people. Because Roxanne is also like the social butterfly, like knows frigging everybody. And so. So yeah. It just, she was, she was one of several people that I was in touch with about this person. 

Zakiya Holy shit. And that's the origin of y'all's friendship. 

Timo Exactly like she is ride or die kind of friend. 

Zakiya So how has Roxanne been involved in other parts of your dating life? 

Timo Yes, a bit like actually my my last ex I was introduced to through Roxanne and all three of us got matching tattoos. 

Zakiya Oh, my gosh. What's the tattoo of? 

Timo It's of a steak. 

Zakiya Like meat. A steak? 

Timo Yes. 

Zakiya Oh, my gosh. Okay, So Roxanne knows all aspects of you. 

Timo Yes. 

Zakiya And your dating, the good and the bad and the steak tattoo. 

Timo And the steak tattoo. 

Zakiya OK, so she sounds perfect for this Phone a Friend date. Is there any Caller in particular you're wanting her thoughts on? 

Timo I would be very curious to know what she thinks of Salix for sure. Yeah. Yeah. Because I feel like Salix in some ways reminds me a little bit of that mutual friend slash my ex. And also being younger, also being trans, also being younger. So I'm just like, maybe that was also maybe my hesitation towards Salix at first I was like, Oh, this is reminding me, maybe they remind me a little bit of my ex in a good way, but also in a way that makes me go like, ooh, you know, like that teakettle was hot before. Should I touch it again with my bare hands? 

Zakiya Yeah. Okay, so after Roxanne talks to all of your callers, she's going to rank them in order. But before we hear that, what's your ranking right now of the four remaining Callers?

Timo Number one, I have to say, Billy. Even though Billy and Salix are kind of tied for one. Number one, Billy, two Salix three…Three Muriah, four Cedar. 

Zakiya Okay, well Timo, you get the week off and next time we'll talk, it'll be in the studio with Roxanne after her dates with your callers. 

Timo The suspense, it's going to kill me all week. And plus, I'm excited for this format and to hear what Roxanne has to say, love it. But I'm also like, oh my God, there's somebody. I'm not going to get a chance to talk to again. And that's freaking me out a little bit. 

Coming up, Roxanne gathers data about Timo’s Callers.

Roxanne Okay. Well, this is very valuable information.

Stay on the line!

Roxanne: Hey everyone, it’s Roxanne. I’m about to get on the phone with each of Timo’s Callers. And here’s the deal. I am going to be playing it cool but there are right answers to the questions I’m asking. 

One of the most important things that I’m looking for is that they are silly. They have to be silly and they cannot take themselves too seriously or anything for that matter. 

Another thing that’s extremely important, is that they have to have a huge big fun friend group that we can also hang out with.

Another thing is that I’m gonna be asking them about their favorite holidays. Mine is Christmas. I think it’s super fun. I love to eat the food. I love to wear the outfits. And I want those people to want to wear the outfits too. So I don’t want somebody with Christmas baggage.

So basically, I’m looking for somebody who can hang out, somebody who is silly and funny, somebody who’s got a big group of friends because that also indicates that they are likable, and then they have to want to go to Christmas soirees enthusiastically.

Zakiya: Roxanne’s first call is with… Cedar.

Cedar So welcome to this madness. 

Roxanne Yeah, it's really fun. I'm like, I'm super…

Cedar I'm sure you're nervous too, just talking to a complete stranger. 

Roxanne Yes, absolutely. It's absolutely weird, but very fun. 

Cedar So, Roxanne, since you're, since you are the guest, ot's your first time. I'll let you kick it off. Hit me with the question, and then we'll go from there. 

Roxanne Yeah, I've got. I've got a lot of questions, but the first one I do want to ask is what is your friend group like? 

Cedar I would say majority of my friends are artists. And so we see the world in a different kind of light at times. And also it's really fun because you get to be around other creative people. And like I said, I, I love the color black, but to get to black, you've got to play with all the colors in the rainbow. And I feel like that's kind of how my, my, my inner circle and my friendship is, so when we're all together, we create and create this beautiful family rainbow. I consider them family more, more than friends. 

Roxanne Yeah. Yeah. How about this? What's your favorite holiday and why? 

Cedar Oh, that's easy for me. Actually, my favorite holiday is Halloween. I love everything horror, spook. It's also a time for people that are questioning maybe their identity or trying to find their true, true self. Because I know a lot of friends myself that are like, you know, Halloween is the first time I, you know, I found drag or I found who I really want to be as as how I’ll identify later as an adult. One time in a year where these young kids get to like not be bullied or be pressured to who they will become later on. So I think it's it's for me, it's it's a lot bigger than just like Halloween. 

Roxanne Gotchu. Okay. What's your least favorite holiday? 

Cedar Oh, geez. That's that's a tough one. But I’d probably say 4th of July.

Roxanne Okay, that's a good one. Okay. Okay, I have another one. So let's say let's say you and Timo are just vibing so hard that you decided to move in together. So Timo comes home with a pet without telling you ahead of time. How do you react? 

Cedar For me. I love animals. My dad was a veterinarian, so. And I grew up on a farm, so I love animals. I would probably be like, Oh my gosh, another responsibility. We should have talked about it, but at the end of the day, I would have been like, all right, come on, we're we're building something here. We might as well add them to the family. 

Roxanne That’s good, great. So you’re an all animal person?

Cedar Yeah

Roxanne All right, so now why don't you ask me some questions that you want to know about Timo or, you know, things you're allowed to ask me? 

Cedar My first question would be because we do know that Timo has other family in the area. If this relationship was to develop, how much of a friend would you feel if Timo moved away because of love? Would you be okay with that? Or would you have a problem? 

Roxanne Oh, my God. Of course I would be okay with that. Yeah, 100%. I support Timo and whatever they do. I am of the opinion that it's not a friend's jurisdiction to, you know, have… 

Cedar Well I mean they're giving you, they're giving you a chance to impact this. I mean, they have to have some kind of general respect or love for you. Obviously, they're going to they're going to want your opinion. That's why I asked the first question.

Roxanne They know my opinion on that. You know, so, yes, they we have a wonderful relationship. And I think part of the reason we have a wonderful relationship is that we don't put parameters on what our dear friends can and should do. You know, ultimately, it's up to the individual to to know what's right for them. And then as the friend you support your friend who's doing what's best for them. 

Cedar Well, Roxanne, it was a pleasure, hopefully we get to meet in person. 

Roxanne Cedar it was an absolute pleasure. Indeed. 

Oop, Doctor Roxanne is definitely reporting for duty!! Lets see if she can suss out one of Timo’s top picks, Salix. 

Salix Nice to meet you, Roxanne. 

Roxanne Very nice to meet you. So actually, let me get into my very first question, if you don't mind. Which is, I want to know what your friend group is like. 

Salix Um, my friend group is it's, it's pretty diverse. I would say that I have like a couple different circles, but all kind of like I really value for different things. I've got kind of like my super close homies that I've been with for a very long time. A couple of them I moved here to New Mexico with, um, and then a couple of them I, I met like recently and we kind of just had like a little a dog pack and I just, we go really far back and so, like, I really, like, have that trust, but then I also have like my DND group. I’d say I have a pretty strong, like, diverse group of people that I that I see and value as friends. 

Roxanne Yeah, that seems great. I like that answer because, you know, I think Timo also has kind of a diverse circle of friends. Okay, here's my next question for you. What is your favorite holiday and why? 

Salix Absolutely no questions asked Halloween.

Roxanne Okay. Halloween.

Salix I really, really love dressing up like I'm super into like, I'm not like a like, high tier cosplayer, but I'm like a pretty solid DIY cosplayer. So I really like an excuse to dress up. I love spooky stuff. I have like a little pumpkin collection, I love dressing up my dogs, I love everything.

Roxanne So here is another question. Let's just pretend for the sake of this question that you and Timo, you know, just really make it and you end up moving in together. And now you and Timo live together, and Timo comes home with a new pet without telling you ahead of time. How do you react?

Salix Mm. Interesting. Um. So I have I have a lot of pets and I'm very like a very like big into animals. I think my main thing is I would be a little bit more concerned about just like not having that conversation ahead of time and like, cause it's also important to me that like the vibes of like… I try to be very intentional about the animals that I bring in and like how they like, work with each other and how they work in our family. And I think like, like it's not, I think, I feel like it'd be less about pet, it would be like, hey, like, why didn't we talk about this? Like, I feel like this was kind of a big decision that we should have, like, maybe, like, discuss together. 

Roxanne OK, what if it was a beta fish? 

Salix Okay, well, I was thinking it was a dog or a cat. If it was a beta fish I’d be fuck yeah let’s get this tank, make it really nice, get all these plants for it. 

Roxanne So you have answered all of my questions or not all of them, but the ones I wanted to ask you and yeah, I had a good chat, it was fun.

Salix Thank you so much for taking the time to do this. I know it's a little bit of a weird thing. 

Roxanne Oh, absolutely. It was, it’s super fun and I'm totally happy to to help. 

Listen sometimes even a beta fish is too much responsibility! And there’s no shame in that. Let’s see what Roxanne thinks of Timo’s number one pick, Billy.

Billy What name are you going by? 

Roxanne Oh, I'm Roxanne.

Billy Roxanne. Pleasure. Great. 

Roxanne Yeah. I was listening to The Police a lot. 

Billy Oh, yes. “Roxanne” [sings] Yeah, Did you ever watch Moulin Rouge? I don't know how you feel about musicals.

Roxanne You know what I haven't. I don't mind a musical. 

Billy My ma who works as a psychic had a client who had access. And so I was exposed at a very young age to live musicals. And since then, I'll like, suck it up, because sometimes I really love the music and the the Roxanne cover in Moulin Rouge is just like, so amazing. It's like heavy duty, like slut shaming. It's amazing.

Roxanne Um, we hate slut shaming, but we do love Roxanne, did I hear you say that your mom is a psychic? 

Billy Yeah, she works as a psychic. I think that was what she would have said then. Present day, she refers to herself as a mystic. 

Roxanne That is fucking rad. Very exciting. Very exciting news. Okay, so by the way, I do have some questions for you that I…

Billy Oh, great. Okay. I'll be quiet. Okay. 

Roxanne No, no, no. You're doing. I am enjoying talking to you. Okay, So I like to know because, you know, Timo and I hang out all the time, and I want to know what your friends are like because if Timo and you start dating, I'm wondering, like, if we got a cool new friend group. 

Billy Oh, I appreciate that. My friend, my friendships are very varied. QT+ community and like farmer community and anti-oppression work community and then like dance party community and sex work community and, yeah I do feel like in most of these places there's like a pretty real value around kind of like authenticity and connection and accountability and justice and like those things feel really sweet as well as what shenanigans are possible. But yes, I would hope I would hope there would be a sweet blend. 

Roxanne Right. I mean, yeah, that's like one of the funnest things about when your friend starts dating someone. Perfect perfect. Okay. Here's another one that's really important to me. Probably less important to Timo. What's your favorite holiday? 

Billy Halloween. 

Roxanne Oh, my God. Everyone. Everyone loves Halloween. 

Billy I just. Well, it is also the only holiday that I feel much of any agency over. What's yours?

Roxanne Well, definitely Christmas. But here's the thing. It is kind of like cos playing “I love Christmas,” you know, because who cares about, like, the actual parts of it? You know, like, if there were no present giving, that would be fine. Actually, it would be preferable. It's really just the outfits because you can wear, like, stupid, weird shit that, you know…

Billy Like permanent pajama mode.

Roxanne Yeah, I mean, yeah, you could just like the whole entire month of December is a party. So here's another question. Let's pretend that you and Timo are like, super in love, and someday you decide to move in together and we are fast forward to this time. 

Billy Wow.

Roxanne So you and Timo are living together, and Timo comes home with a pet they didn't tell you about. How do you react? 

Billy Oh, I feel like this happens to me regularly. I like this question. 

Roxanne Yeah. Yeah. Well, you know, it's funny because people take it very seriously. They're like, Well, the first thing I have to say is I would be a little disappointed about the lack of communication. It's like, fuck that, go with it being a fun little funny thing. Like, let's not assume Timo brought home a horse. I'm up for it. Yeah. So.

Billy Yeah, like, I'm sure, you know, you didn't set up the entire parameters, but yeah, I would guess like an animal that they would love. I would likely also love. 

Roxanne Super good luck in this next round. It was absolutely fantastic to meet you. 

Billy Yeah. Thank you, same.

Wait if Billy’s mom is a psychic, does that mean she can predict who will get the hang up? Let’s eavesdrop on Roxanne’s last date with Muriah.

Roxanne Hi, Muriah. 

Muriah Hi. 

Roxanne I'm Roxanne, Timo's friend. 

Muriah Hi, Roxanne. 

Roxanne How do you think it's going? 

Muriah I think it's going well. 

Roxanne Do you want to expound? 

Muriah Well, the actual first date that we had together, they told me about their kids and, um, aged nine, I believe. Nine and 17. 

Roxanne Yeah.

Muriah And I was like, Oh, my gosh, I love kids. You know, like, kids are amazing. I have a daughter of my own, and she's now 22. And I just I've learned so much from her and from so many other kids that I have around me. So I'm like, “Ooh, I would like to meet your kids.” But that comes down the road. 

Roxanne Of course. Yeah, I, I doubt Timo is was going to, you know, put them on a conference call or anything like that of course.

Muriah Oh, no, no.

Roxanne Yeah. Okay, cool. Well, that sounds good. And it's fun to hear that you also have a kid. Okay, So I am going to ask you if you don't mind a couple of questions, because I'm asking everyone, you know, kind of the same questions just because I want to compare. 

Muriah Absolutely, yeah, you've got to watch out for your friend. It's all good. No worries. 

Roxanne No doubt. No doubt. And so speaking of friends, what is your friend group like? 

Muriah Oh, my goodness. I have a ton of friends. Only a couple of them are close to me. I have two best friends. One is in Albuquerque, one is in Santa Fe. And I absolutely love them. We've been friends for over 30 years. And most of my friends I've been friends with for at least 30 to 20 years. So, yeah, I, I love my friends. Absolutely. 

Roxanne Fantastic. So you would say that you you you have like a deep friend group that you've known for a super long time?

Muriah Yes. 

Roxanne Can I ask you what your favorite holiday is and why? 

Muriah Halloween. Halloween because, I'm kind of spooky, like, I mean, I don't do, like, the whole spooky look anymore. I used to be goth in high school or whatever, but horror is my favorite genre of movies and stuff, and Timo knows this. I've told them. 

Roxanne Okay, so what's your least favorite holiday? 

Muriah Christmas. 

Roxanne Oh, go on. 

Muriah Okay. So Christmas. Oh, my goodness. I could see if there was like a relevant holiday, like for friends and family, you know, to get together and like, do art and do, like, work for each other instead of going out and be like, I need to buy $1,000 worth of gifts to give them out. 

Roxanne Totally

Muriah Oh, yeah, it's. Oh, goodness. It's not even Jesus's birthday. His birthday's in February. Oh, gosh. Okay. I'm not going to say anything because I just go on and on and on and on and on forever. 

Roxanne Okay. Well, this is very valuable information. Okay, Here's a fun one. All right. So let's say that you and Timo live together, and Timo comes home and they have a pet. And they have not told you that they were bringing home a pet. How do you react? 

Muriah Oh, my gosh. Bring all the pets. Okay. Cats, dogs, snakes, scorpions, anything but spiders. I'm good. 

Roxanne OK. Well, I wish you very good luck in this next round, and maybe I'll be meeting you soon. 

Muriah Yeah, hopefully. That would be great. 

Next week, Timo is back.

Timo My palms are sweating just hearing you say it because it's like I don't want to roast somebody. But also like, this is true.

They’ll get the 411 from Roxanne on all of their Callers… 

Roxanne I've taken this responsibility very seriously. And also not at all. 

and hear who she thinks should get the hang up.

Roxanne: I also have harsh judgments. 

Then, they’ll make their choice— to either take her advice, or hit ignore.

Roxanne So picking the hang up right now?

Timo Picking the hang up, Who would you say? 

Roxanne Hands down. I mean, just absolutely. 100%...

But that’s next week… stay on the line!

Hang Up is created and produced by me, Caitlin Pierce.

Our host and story editor is Zakiya Gibbons.

Our sound designer, mix engineer, and story editor is Ben Montoya.

And that’s it— our whole team is just three people. We put so much time and love into Hang Up because we believe in this show— And we get to make it weird and silly and queer and exactly what we want it to be because we are independent.

But to stay independent, we need your support. Here’s a few ways you can help:

• Rate Hang Up with 5 stars on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.

• Tell a friend about the show.

• Follow us on Instagram @hangupshow.

• Subscribe to our newsletter and donate at hang up show.com— you can read about what goes on behind the scenes, access exclusive content, and even get Hang Up swag. Find out more on our website— hang up show.com.

We can’t do it alone— thank you for your support.

Our sounding board is Allison Behringer, Karla Corrales, Chioke I’Anson, and Grayum Vickers.

Music by Jeff Carter and Stephen Pathe of Sandy - hear more at sandy-sounds.com

Show Art by Alex Teschel

Season Two Art by Marquez Torres.

Studio recording by Josh Wilcox of Brooklyn Podcasting Studio and Sid Fendley of Mountain Road Recording

This episode uses many sounds from Freesound, for the full list check out our website— hangupshow.com.

Special thanks to Bess Friedman, Trevor Birt, Oliver Yaney, Toni of Albuquerque Social Club, Michael Burdick of Sidewinders, Quinn Heraty, Nellie Giles, and the Radio Diaries team. 

Thanks also to the people supporting us at Radiotopia and PRX— Yooree Losordo, Audrey Mardavich, Apu Goteh, Carolyn Willander, Molly Perkins, Sher Delva, Gretchen Borzi, Maggie Gourville, and Audrey Davidson, just to name a few.

Hang Up is a proud member of Radiotopia from PRX, a network of independent, creator-owned, listener-supported podcasts. Discover audio with vision at Radiotopia.fm.